Song of the Indeterminate Time Period, 8 February 2K5 (Part The First)
(for Kevin C., the latest in a long line of cockbites)

Someone told me once
That there's a right and wrong
And punishment would come
To those who dared to cross the line

But it must not... be true
For a jerk-off just like you
And maybe it... takes longer
To catch a... TOTAL ASSHOLE
But I'm tired of waiting

Someone told me once
That there's a right and wrong
And punishment would come
To those who dared to cross the line

But it must not... be true
For a jerk-off just like you
Maybe it's... just bullshit
I should play God, and SHOOT YOU MYSELF
'Cause I'm tired of waiting

Consequences dictate
Our course of action
And it doesn't matter what's right
It's only wrong if you get caught
If consequences dictate
My course of action
I should play God, and SHOOT YOU MYSELF
I'm so tired of waiting

I should kick you,
Beat you,
Fuck you,
And then shoot you in your fucking head!

-- Tool
"Jerk-Off" (live)
Opiate (1992)

Part The Second

I can't say what I want to
Even when I'm not serious
Things like...
"Fuck yourself
Kill yourself
You piece of shit"

People tell me what to say
What to think
And what to play

I say...
"Go fuck yourself, you piece of shit
Why don't you go kill yourself?"

Just kidding.

-- Tool
"Hush"
Opiate (1992)

I've Heard Of Monday Morning Quarterbacking, But...

And as my man Mr. Harris goes 0-2 in his conference final picks (*runs like da fuggin' wind*), we get a Super Bowl Hype Week full of pre-game sniping, moreso than in recent years. Of course, being on The Far Side Of The World means we get the game early Monday morning. And the skipper was sufficiently magnaminous to let us have the day off to watch it. Now if they'd only release me from duty section an hour early so I can catch kickoff...

Seperated At Birth?

And on that note, I just noticed today that Cap'n Parker looks an awful lot like Chef Boyardee.

Smells Like Cockbite, Tastes Like Chicken

So, after a productive morning fuckstarting as many heads as I could find in Data Processing (three accounts in my name and nobody told me what the logon names or passwords were!) and Personnel (I've been here a month and you dragasses STILL haven't listed me as gained yet?!), I find out that the next bunch of maroons that need my minstrations are over in Disbursing (read: bean counters), who have until now been very good about getting my pay in. Which means I am STILL without the funds to buy a replacement computer to call my own.

And to top all that off, somebody in the division just proved himself to be a cockbite by bitching about me behind my back, unaware that I was elsewhere in the berthing and within earshot at the time.

NP: Dr. Dre & Ice Cube, "Natural Born Killaz"